The Pick up Artist is a man who is a part of the seduction community. Today we take a look at one PUA’s perspective of what the the community is all about.
Daclaud Lee: Welcome to Random Interviews. Today’s guest is the Pick up Artist. I think most people by now know a little bit about the PUA community, but in your own words, can you tell me a little bit about the community?
Pick Up Artist (PUA): Honestly, Daclaud, can I just set the record straight? I don’t like to classify myself as a “pick up artist”. I mean, yeah, I subscribe to certain PUA strategies, but I’m more or less just a guy who is a minor part of the community. I guess some people might say I’m a PUA, but I’m in no way a guru.
DL: Fair enough. Just tell me what you know about the PUA community.
PUA: To answer your question, the PUA community is the answer to every man’s age old question of “what women want”. The PUA community is a place where men can discuss ways to become more successful with women.
DL: Okay, but all women are different aren’t they? How can the PUA community help a man become more successful with women?
PUA: The PUA community has a lot of great information and it can help a lot, but not every PUA has right opinion or strategy that’s right for you. And yes, every woman is different, and you’re not always going to be successful with each one. The PUA community is a great way to discover yourself and your style of pick up. It can help a guy who has absolutely no social skills become more confident or it can help an established player become better at his game. You want to pick up women. Whether you want a girl friend or you want to f*ck women, you have to play the game right, you have to get the girl.
DL: A friend of mine joined a local lair and told me it was filled with people who adopt the douche bag persona. Why do you think a lot of Pick up artists are considered douche bags?
PUA: I guess the whole “douche bag” thing was originally associated with the age old Askmen.com material by David d’Angelo, with the whole “cocky funny” bull shit, which may have worked in the past, and may or may not work right now depending on who you talk to. The whole concept was to tell guys that girls only like assholes and how nice guys always finish last. That kind of PUA material is kind of outdated now but was popular back in the late 90’s and early 2000’s. It’s mainly outdated because women obviously learn the techniques because every guy is doing it, they catch onto it.
DL: In your opinion, who is the best Pick Up Guru out there?
PUA: That’s kind of debatable, but the guy who commonly has that title is called Mystery, just because he has a lot of publicity and has been interviewed a lot by talk show hosts. Personally I think Mystery is a pretty good pick up guru, but is he the best? I don’t know. Other pick up gurus include Neil Strauss, JT Tran, and Julien Blanc, but there are a lot more of them out there and each one has his own unique strategy. I can’t say I like one style more than another, but I’ve certainly learned a lot from listening to these guys. Each one has some pretty valid points.
DL: A lot of people, tend to think the PUA community is filled with misogynistic and angst filled men who are there to manipulate women. Do you think that’s true?
PUA: Just like Star Wars, there is a light and a dark side to every PUA. There are going to be guys out there who genuinely want to find a girlfriend and then there are guys out there who just want to f*ck hot girls. It really depends on what PUA you talk to and what you want.
It’s like the difference in styles between two well known PUA instructors JT Tran and Julien Blanc. JT Tran being the Jedi and Julien Blanc being the Sith. Obviously if you’re more into the Jedi ways, you want to develop PUA techniques that reflect that style, And if you’re a Sith, you would probably want PUA techniques that reflect the Sith style.
After you find a PUA philosophy to adapt, you will need to find strategies that work for you. Just like light saber fighting styles for example, do you want to go for the classic single light saber style or Darth Maul’s double saber style? Do you do better with Form 1 or Form 8? (Just don’t hate). I say this for all the nerds, (and yes, I’m also a nerd). Are you a light armor or heavy armor of guy? It’s all up to you to discover the type of PUA philosophy and strategy that works best for you and adapting to it.
DL: So you can either be the douche bag type of guy who comes up with an elaborate lie about his job and income as a neurosurgeon or you can be the guy who is totally honest about his crappy customer service job but is honest about improving himself?
PUA: Absolutely! The whole point of being a PUA is about winning the game. It doesn’t matter how you do it, you just have to win. Some guys play by the book and other guys have to cheat. If you can win honestly, then that’s the honorable thing to do, but if you have to cheat, then I’m not here to judge. We all live for what we live for.
But in the end it’s still a game. If you’re a casual gamer who likes to play for fun, that’s fine, you certainly want to have fun, but you’re not going to get anywhere if you aren’t there to win. Playing for fun is not going to guarantee you getting laid unless you’re a natural ladies man and you don’t really even have to try, but most guys aren’t, so they have to learn how to win. Just like in any competitive game, you should treat it like you can’t afford to lose. If you’re playing Texas Hold em, you have to win to get the pot; it’s all or nothing, because second place literally gets nothing.
DL: So what do you do if you happen to lose?
PUA: I don’t want anyone to take this philosophy the wrong way. Sure you want to win, but you have to understand that you can’t win every time, but you should always play to win. Just don’t take a loss too harshly. Every loss actually allows you to get better at your game if you learn from it. If you don’t lose, you won’t learn and if you don’t learn, you can’t win.
DL: That’s a good way to look at it. So what’s the best advice you can give to all the aspiring PUA guys out there?
PUA: It never hurts to read and listen to different strategies. I’m not saying you can learn everything by reading a book or listening to a seminar, but it will help you discover more about yourself and the pick up artist strategy that works for you,